The Associated Pest

Dear Sasha,
I have a “friend” who I really enjoy sleeping with. We seem to have a great connection in the bedroom, and I like that I can call him up for sex whenever I please, and I do not need to constantly inform him of my daily happenings.  It has gone well so far, but […]

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The results of the most recent Pest Poll are in and readers have chosen that “Home” is the best place for our US military presence to be right now. “Home” received an overwhelming 62% of all votes, handily beating out “Darfur” (12%), “Afghanistan” (9%), Iran (8%), “Iraq” (5%), and “Korea” (4%).
“We are definitely spreading […]

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Dooms-day-may-be-on-the-way. Arctic ice is melting so quickly now, that according to Nasa scientist Jay Zwally, “At this rate, the Arctic Ocean could be nearly ice-free at the end of summer by 2012″ He’s talking about the record ice melt in Greenland this last year, and how we are at a point […]

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Dear Sasha,
I was totally vibing this guy at a bar the other night. We ended up going out a few nights ago and had a wonderful night. At the end of the evening, I started to get nervous, and while he was saying goodbye, I cut him off and said some things that made it […]

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Attn: Pest Readers
The following is a copy of the letter I recently sent the Sci-Fi Channel, asking someone to answer for the crime against art and humanity that IS their adaptation of the H.G. Wells classic science fiction novel, “War of the Worlds.”
Dear Sci-Fi Channel,
I don’t typically do this, but what I saw last night […]

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As I walked out of the Comcast Center the other night after watching my Terrapins drop their conference opener to Boston College, I thought to myself, “Those referees really fucked us.” And as always, I was right. One of Maryland’s best guards, Greivis Vasquez fouled out with 10:30 left in the second half. […]

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With holiday parties in full force, I have received a couple of questions on how to deal with the common party mishaps. Food, booze, and babes flourish as everyone dances the night away to their favorite holiday jingle, but what is a person to do the Monday
after their company party is over?

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Well the impossible almost happened!!!
Dallas 28
Detroit 27
What a Honest Game?
We as the people got Fucked without being Kissed! That Hurt but Peace comes in the Morning , and We learned Our final lesson. You can Not Beat Them!!!

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Last weekend in the NFL it was another hit or miss situation. I have seen more strange games this year than any other I have seen in the last 55 years.
This weekend I expect a few more big upsets.  The worst of which would be Dallas losing to a terrible team Detroit! Detroits defence […]

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Last month Disney was forced to close famed attraction, It’s A Small World because the people of that world are apparently not so small at all. The boats were bottoming out causing delays, and keeping families stuck in the eerie ride. For a long time employees knew of these weight issues, and would leave empty […]

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