The Associated Pest

 I may be treading into my esteemed colleague the Southsnake’s territory with this week’s post, but my hometown duties call to me.  The Bucs and the Giants will meet in the playoffs in less than an hour from the time I type this, and I daresay I’m not much of a man if I don’t get my prediction in before anyone has scored.  So here it is:  Bucs by ten.

Yeah, I saw last week’s game, with Eli playing way over his head, and Plaxico Burress doing his poor man’s fourth-rate Randy Moss impression, rah-rah team, whatever.  I know they almost beat the Patriots last week, but they busted all their  starter’s asses to even be competitive with the Patriots.

The Bucs have been resting for two weeks, and while Garcia is bitching about being rusty, what he needs to understand is that he’s a 38 year old quarterback now and the team needs to take steps to rest and protect him before playoffs.  That’s great for him that he still talks shit like a badass, but I think he’ll be more dangerous rested and pain-free then he would be after playing two meaningless games against spoiler-happy linebackers trying to give him a career ACL.

I  keep hearing the Giants running game is going to hurt our boys out there.  Admittedly the Bucs defense of today is  built more with an eye towards breaking up passes with athletic corners and safeties than it is run-stuffing with massive linemen, but at best I will cede the G-Men a little over 100 on the ground–and it won’t be enough.

Michael Strahan is done.  The hooves have flown off this beat-down cantankerous sack-happy old warhorse of a player, and it’s time to ship ol’ Boxer off to the glue factory.  His best days are behind him.  Granted, he is a living icon, but think Warren Sapp in his last few seasons.  Still dangerous, but he’ll never be the all-game player that he was.  He may look like he’s in shape, but come about, oh, half an hour now, he’s going to be whistling through gaps in his secondary, as well as the gaps in his Tyson-esque, damaged maw.

Eli Manning will be humiliated, abused, and taken advantage of by the defense like a drunken sorority chick who stayed too long at a Pike party.  His big brother Peyton will be shown bawling on the Jumbo-tron on a regular basis throughout the game, crying in fear for the sanctity of his brother’s spinal column.

Plays to look for:  Ronde Barber’s standard, expected interception return for a touchdown, Galloway streaking down the middle all by his lonesome for a 70-yard, “Jurevicius in the Super Bowl” style touchdown, and EG making people miss and moving the pile like he’s done for us all year.

Bucs 24, Giants 14.  Suck it, Big Blue.

Last 5 posts by Steve

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